A better day

A new day. Eight hours of sleep. Eight hours of assistance today. Time to run to Curves. Not quite free of responsibilities - grocery shopping and hospital visit - but at least I'm not encumbered by walker, Depends, and other tools of the caretaking trade.

And best of all, Mom has been sitting up. Her breathing is better. She can use the bathroom. She's alert and glued to daytime TV. A vast difference from yesterday. When Dad and I left her last night she was breathing with great difficulty, and she had been knocked out by a too-large dose of an anti-anxiety drug. This morning the nurse told me they had called a "code-med" about 7:30 p.m., which brought doctors swarming around her to devise a new strategy. They also called in a sitter to watch her all night because she became agitated and tried to get out of bed. They've changed her blood pressure meds, which made a huge difference.

Dad and I had a "creative breakthrough" last night. I fixed dinner in the apartment because we were both too tired to go to the dining room or a restaurant. After dinner I was giving him a preview of our plans for today (shower day for him, assisted by the home health aid). He was very thoughtful, then said, "Too many names." I asked if he was confused about names, and he said he was embarrassed that sometimes he cannot remember his own full name.

I said, "Dad, let's play a game." I folded a sheet of paper. On one side I wrote clues: your full name, your wife's name, daughter 1, daughter 2, grandson 1, grandson 2, etc. On the other side of the paper, on the corresponding lines, I wrote the names that belonged to each clue. I showed him how to look at the clue, try to recall the name, and turn the paper over to find the answer. He loved it! He wants me to add more names to the list. He hid his game under his placemat for safe keeping. I promised we'd play the game every day.

Sue